I find myself at Walmart late in the evening. It’s Surrey. I’m at the city centre location. City centre seems like it’s going to be a swell place from the name, but in the end it’s just a name. Sure it’s where businesses and the mall are, it’s where the skytrain is, the SFU campus, but it’s also where all those things happen that you don’t want to be a part of. Especially when the sun goes down.

I’m on a mission. I want to print out some photos of my kids to tack up in my cubicle. I’m going to make my work space a lot more cute.

I sign all the rights to my photos over to Walmart until the end of time. I’m selecting photos when I hear some loud talking by the movie section in electronics. I can’t help but overhear.

They have that slow way of talking that comes from either underdeveloped brains, damaged brains, or drug use, which is the same thing. There are four of them. Three guys and one girl. They look like they smell like body odour and wet dirty leaves on the sidewalk.

“Look at all these movies you get for 50 bucks. This is crazy.” The bigger guy says.

The girl walks away without responding. I’m guessing something shiny caught her eye.

“Hey, I said: look at all these movies-”

“I heard you. I don’t care for movies.” She replies from somewhere to the side, I can’t see her.

“I like movies.” The tall, skinny one says and he comes over. By tall I mean tall, I maybe come up to his shoulders if I’m wearing lifts.

There is a short guy somewhere too. I can’t see him. He’s about 5 feet tall, with lifts. He has a sideways hat that has all the stickers still on it. He was headed to the CD bin last I saw him. He could be standing right behind it and I wouldn’t know. Maybe the tall guy lifts him into the bins when he wants to look around.

The tall guy is astounded now, he says in a really loud and deep voice, the kind of voice you’d expect from a giant anyway, “Whoa, that’s so cool. Let’s get it.”

“Yeah, we need this.” The big guy agrees.

“Beauty and the Beast?!” The tall guy bellows out. This is my favourite movie.”

“I used to love that movie.” The big guy says.

“I still do. She’s a babe.” That’s the tall guy.

“Not no more she ain’t. She’s too old now.”

I wonder if they mean the little girl from Harry Potter or the cartoon. The conversation is maybe taking a dark turn now and these three stooges have my undivided attention.

The girl waddles back, the shiny thing must not be shiny anymore, and she says “I heard that you perverts.”

“Yeah well it’s true. She ain’t all that pretty anymore. They need to redo this movie with a pretty girl.”

Because you’re such a catch there Prince Charming, I think.

My expectations fall flat, as most do, as she says to him “But I’m still pretty?”

He says “Yeah of course you are.”

They kiss.

It’s horrible. But it’s none of my business. The skinny guy watches. I watch him. The short guy appears as if teleported. He watches too. I watch him. I look back the couple as they loudly suck face. The little guy says “Woooo-oooo.”

The tall guy joins in.

Do I?

Fuck no, what’s wrong with you? I go back to my photo selection.

What’s the lesson? Love will find a way? Baby, love wins every time? Or maybe: stay out of Walmart when the sun goes down.